Hey Dearies!!
So, it's been a while since I last wrote, a very long while. I was busy pushing everyone and putting them at an arm's length.
And now that everyone close to me is around, I can finally focus my energy on myself.
When you reach a point where you realize that you have lost the person that you used to be, you have two choices. First, to find the person you were before. Second, to lose that person completely.
Well, I chose to walk down a third path. To improve on the person that I used to be. I had started letting people affect me, letting their words hurt me. I had completely mellowed down. Silly me, I had actually let people in. Maybe just a few layers. But, I had.
It all began a few months ago, something triggered in me and I realized that a lot had changed. I had changed.
Luckily for me, internals came and so did my brother's wedding. It was completely mental! I even got sick. That month served as a perfect excuse for me to take a step back from every relationship, not because I despise the people in my life, but because sometimes, distancing yourself from others brings you closer to yourself.
The way I was invested in everyone's life, always ready to help and be a shoulder to lean on had actually started to affect my mental well being. Especially, when the favor wasn't really returned. People had started to take me for granted. And I knew that it was happening. But, even then I let it happen. After all, I was being a 'good friend'.
But, after all of that, the escape from people, has been amazing. I don't feel the need to talk to anyone at all. I am more focused on 'me' now. And soon, my college vacation will begin. So, it will again, serve as good excuse to take a break from people in general.
My books were missing me anyway. I have about eight of them unread. So, this is me saying sayonara. So long, people!
So, it's been a while since I last wrote, a very long while. I was busy pushing everyone and putting them at an arm's length.
And now that everyone close to me is around, I can finally focus my energy on myself.
When you reach a point where you realize that you have lost the person that you used to be, you have two choices. First, to find the person you were before. Second, to lose that person completely.
Well, I chose to walk down a third path. To improve on the person that I used to be. I had started letting people affect me, letting their words hurt me. I had completely mellowed down. Silly me, I had actually let people in. Maybe just a few layers. But, I had.
It all began a few months ago, something triggered in me and I realized that a lot had changed. I had changed.
Luckily for me, internals came and so did my brother's wedding. It was completely mental! I even got sick. That month served as a perfect excuse for me to take a step back from every relationship, not because I despise the people in my life, but because sometimes, distancing yourself from others brings you closer to yourself.
The way I was invested in everyone's life, always ready to help and be a shoulder to lean on had actually started to affect my mental well being. Especially, when the favor wasn't really returned. People had started to take me for granted. And I knew that it was happening. But, even then I let it happen. After all, I was being a 'good friend'.
But, after all of that, the escape from people, has been amazing. I don't feel the need to talk to anyone at all. I am more focused on 'me' now. And soon, my college vacation will begin. So, it will again, serve as good excuse to take a break from people in general.
My books were missing me anyway. I have about eight of them unread. So, this is me saying sayonara. So long, people!
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| Ciao |
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